Follow YARN on Instagram New Content
  Chat with YARN on Telegram We are not robots

The Masseuse - Seinfeld [S05E09]

TV-PG Comedy
 

Jerry gets mad when he dates a masseuse. Kramer and George get massages while Jerry doesn't. Meanwhile, Elaine's new boyfriend is Joel Rifkin, an innocent man who shares the same name as one of New York's most notorious serial killers.

#1
The Masseuse - Seinfeld [S05E09]
Released: 1993-11-18, Rated: TV-PG
Score: 28.600
Would Joel Rifkin report to the stadium office.
#2
The Masseuse - Seinfeld [S05E09]
Released: 1993-11-18, Rated: TV-PG
Score: 26.504
"Can you believe it? I'm vomiting on June 29th again."
#3
The Masseuse - Seinfeld [S05E09]
Released: 1993-11-18, Rated: TV-PG
Score: 25.208
Yes. Because my previous vomit was also June 29th, 1972.
#4
The Masseuse - Seinfeld [S05E09]
Released: 1993-11-18, Rated: TV-PG
Score: 24.474
Little Stuart Rifkin likes to go shopping with his mother.
#5
The Masseuse - Seinfeld [S05E09]
Released: 1993-11-18, Rated: TV-PG
Score: 24.394
I feel full after the risotto.
#6
The Masseuse - Seinfeld [S05E09]
Released: 1993-11-18, Rated: TV-PG
Score: 24.131
It's killing me, Jerry!
#7
The Masseuse - Seinfeld [S05E09]
Released: 1993-11-18, Rated: TV-PG
Score: 23.821
Joel Rifkin, telephone.
#8
The Masseuse - Seinfeld [S05E09]
Released: 1993-11-18, Rated: TV-PG
Score: 23.097
Come on, just look at me. Now tell me I'm not Kramer.
#9
The Masseuse - Seinfeld [S05E09]
Released: 1993-11-18, Rated: TV-PG
Score: 22.879
I don't submit to forcible massage.
#10
The Masseuse - Seinfeld [S05E09]
Released: 1993-11-18, Rated: TV-PG
Score: 22.850
Hey! I am looser than creamed corn.
#11
The Masseuse - Seinfeld [S05E09]
Released: 1993-11-18, Rated: TV-PG
Score: 21.316
I'm Claude Seinfeld.
#12
The Masseuse - Seinfeld [S05E09]
Released: 1993-11-18, Rated: TV-PG
Score: 20.323
...and after every sip, he would go:
#13
The Masseuse - Seinfeld [S05E09]
Released: 1993-11-18, Rated: TV-PG
Score: 19.843
You're a massage teaser.
#14
The Masseuse - Seinfeld [S05E09]
Released: 1993-11-18, Rated: TV-PG
Score: 19.429
So apparently, adoption leads to serial killing.
#15
The Masseuse - Seinfeld [S05E09]
Released: 1993-11-18, Rated: TV-PG
Score: 18.776
Remy Rifkin?
#16
The Masseuse - Seinfeld [S05E09]
Released: 1993-11-18, Rated: TV-PG
Score: 18.639
Sounds of the forest.
#17
The Masseuse - Seinfeld [S05E09]
Released: 1993-11-18, Rated: TV-PG
Score: 17.984
"You know, sometimes I feel like I don't even know who you are anymore."
#18
The Masseuse - Seinfeld [S05E09]
Released: 1993-11-18, Rated: TV-PG
Score: 17.907
A woman that hates me this much comes along once in a lifetime.
#19
The Masseuse - Seinfeld [S05E09]
Released: 1993-11-18, Rated: TV-PG
Score: 17.626
Ned's a guy who buys irregular underwear. Next.
#20
The Masseuse - Seinfeld [S05E09]
Released: 1993-11-18, Rated: TV-PG
Score: 17.269
- What? - The massages are out!
#21
The Masseuse - Seinfeld [S05E09]
Released: 1993-11-18, Rated: TV-PG
Score: 17.233
No. Veto.
#22
The Masseuse - Seinfeld [S05E09]
Released: 1993-11-18, Rated: TV-PG
Score: 17.083
Let's discuss this later.
#23
The Masseuse - Seinfeld [S05E09]
Released: 1993-11-18, Rated: TV-PG
Score: 16.973
- Rifkin? Joel Rifkin? - Yeah. It's just a coincidence...
#24
The Masseuse - Seinfeld [S05E09]
Released: 1993-11-18, Rated: TV-PG
Score: 16.853
He's a bad seed.
#25
The Masseuse - Seinfeld [S05E09]
Released: 1993-11-18, Rated: TV-PG
Score: 16.817
- She told you she doesn't like me? - Yes.